The Phily Diner is the uber-diner, the ur-diner, the quintessential diner. It is the only diner, so far, that we have awarded five stars.

I don't know what is up with the (mis)spelling of their name. I can only speculate that there exists somewhere else (probably actually in Philadelphia) a "Philly Diner," and so they were forced to leave off an "l." This does not detract from its diner goodness.

The Phily Diner is located in Barrington. I think we have only been going there for a year, maybe two tops, but we have been there countless times. They have a full-size convertible in the waiting area - I think they are trying for a nostalgic, 50s diner feel. We have had countless meals here, and there are a few special shout-outs that I have to extend. First, it is open 24 hours, and they have large booths in the smoking section, so it has provided us with late-night comfort seating. Second, the challah bread French toast is particularly good. Third, all of their desserts (and we have tried plenty) are delicious - I can especially recommend the chocolate-coated cheesecake (kind of a Magic Shell effect), the tiramisu, the fudge cake (three layers of thick, thick frosting that I think end up equalling more frosting than cake per slice), and HUGE sundaes. Seriously. Do not order these sundaes unless you are really hungry.

Also, you may think that we just pull these coffee cup ratings out of thin air, but we do have a scientific system in place to compare these diners. One of the criteria that we judge on is the quality of the french fries. Now, I happen to not be a big fan of the Phily Diner fry. They are sometimes oddly crispy, and when we went there recently, they were rocking more of a shoestring cut, which I am fundamentally opposed to. So you can get an idea of what I look for in a fry, I offer this description of the Perfect Fry (TM): chunky cut - the chunkier the better. I love wedges and waffle and steak fries, although none of these are usually served as diner french fries, although they may have them available as a separate item. The Perfect Fry should be golden brown, lightly crispy on the outside, and meltingly warm and tender on the inside. There are many accompaniments to the Perfect Fry: I enjoy ketchup, salt and vinegar, honey mustard sauce, and (when I was in the Netherlands) mayonnaise, which is not at all the same as mayonnaise here, and is an accepted Fry condiment.

I know I may encounter some disagreement from you crispy shoestring lovers out there, so feel free to comment away. In any case, this is why diners are so superior to fast food outlets. In most cases, the fries just can't compare. In my opinion, Wendy's is the best of a feeble, feeble bunch. As to diners, the Palace Diner has the best fries I have ever tasted, but we haven't gotten there yet...

As I mentioned before, the Phily Diner gets