Be honest — did any of you think that? Well, it’s apparently how Sable has gotten her first (and hopefully/possibly last) dose of the big C (as opposed to the little, harmless c she had last time) — from a dog bite. I now hate the people across the street even more. Sable was diagnosed with a mid-grade malignant cancer that may not have metastasized yet, but we have to get regular checkups to be sure. The doctor told me that the particular type of cancer likes to go for the lungs via the bloodstream. Which is funny because Sable likes to go for donuts via your hand.

The biggest funfact is that this cancer often shows up in areas of prior trauma. Of course, the growth had been in the area where Sable was bit during the infamous Battle of Woodlawn Ave, where she and Laura were sneak-attacked by the sinister Cupcake and her desire for street-domination. The reason Laura and I didn’t expect it to be cancer is because a sutcher had been pushing through the skin, so we thought it was just a sutcher that didn’t dissolve or get removed.

I guess it’s only fair that Sable got cancer since Cupcake had to have a skin graft and muscle tissue work done. And the florist boyfriend who has no control over the children or mother lost his leg to diabetes. So, the universe is really balancing out here. Of course, what would really be fair is if those people across the street were deported back to White Trashlandia and Cupcake were put in the care of someone with a fence and a leash.

The good news is that there’s no sign that the cancer has moved to her lungs or lymphnodes. But damn if Sable isn’t tired of wearing my old t-shirts to cover up her wounds! At least she’ll have a cool pirate scar.

My only warning is that you should expect Laura and I to talk about Sable even more now then ever before. So brace yourselves.

Now that I think about this more, though, I realize that Buddy got a cat and then Sable got cancer. Therefore, Buddy is a witch. And his cat is evil.