I was in North Carolina over this past weekend because my friend Kristen (who makes so-low-budget-that-they-don't-have-a-budget independent movies) had a short film in the Gate City Women's Film Festival in Greensboro. I attended both nights of the competition screenings and I have this to say: the absolute worst films screened were the ones that won the most awards. It reminded me of the Oscars, in a lot of ways.

Also, although I did see all of the films, the program provided didn't engender a lot of enthusiasm. Here's the description Kristen provided for her film in the program:

A short film that explores sibling dynamics through the eyes of the over-achieving older sister and addresses the expectations (both good and bad) we have for each other.

[You can see the movie here]

But after reading the other film descriptions, I am convinced that she would have won if only she had described it thusly:

This experimental and personal documentary explores themes of immigration, death, and media. It is a sensual visionary encounter that is bold and evocative and covers themes related to African-American culture. Conceptually, this work examines personal and collective histories through the symbolic language of Jungian archetypes. This film examines how beauty can arise from the ashes of intolerance. in a surrealist world where she has no control, a young girl reveals the harsh realities of life in a West African village, even as she expresses optimism for the future. The filmmaker offers viewers a delicious and disturbing six minute dance with issues of memory construction, patterns, seduction, and sexual identity formation.

[These are actual quotes]

In short, the best things about the South are sweet tea and the Waffle House. That is all.