But first, a dream sequence. Last night, I had a crazy dream where I was driving, and the car engine was making strange noises. In the dream, I started to get concerned...until I woke up and realized that the engine noises were really the sound of my air conditioner, switching between not-cool-enough and too-cold states.

So, on to my dilemma. Everyone here knows how pale I am and how I don't tan. We have all heard the burst-into-flames joke; in fact, I think it's here somewhere on this very website. Before I went to England, I was using self-tanner to approximate the color normal skin gets when it is exposed to sun. Mike (who becomes beautifully tan two minutes after stepping outdoors) made fun of me endlessly for the self-tanner, mostly by calling me "Sunkist."

When I was in England, I stopped using the self-tanner in favor of normal lotion, because even though the weather was nice, absolutely no one there was tan. The English are truly my people.

So now I am back and pale. Mike opposes my resuming the self-tanner, but I do kind of feel like a freak being pale in the summer. What say you, Pop5 - should I self-tan or not?